Like I Am a Nobody

This is our third week in crowd-sourcing a new direction in youth ministry. Start here and play along. Previous Post: Creating Homes of Faith

Chapter 3 – Somebody to Someone

Here I am trying to change, yet people will not give me a chance. It’s so typical.

My other brother, the eldest one, seems to be demanding attention be spent in his direction. At any given time in my life you could easily find him standing in front of me, casting shadows on me, and attempting to suck some light away from me. He refuses to let me shine, preferring to take the glory and cast me into his shadow.

I am so frustrated, and cannot believe he hasn’t changed after all this time.

His anger is attention seeking. His tantrum outside the door is meant to distract, and Father races to smooth his ruffled feathers. It’s hard to believe that my brother and I are even related as I watch him go on the attack, treating me like I am nobody, tossing much verbal dirt around my name and reputation. It is not that he is wrong; it is just that he is so determined to make this event about him. He even refuses to re-enter the party until he has gained promises from our father. He is manipulating, maximizing the situation to his own advantage.

So very typical.

What is it with the older generation? They speak of righteousness, but seem only concerned with being correct. While I was away, there was no shortage of someone willing to help me spend all that I had, yet there was quite a shortage of anyone to help me when I had nothing. Eventually someone did provide me with some employment which involved tending to those evil-spirited filthy pigs. It was clear, however, that I was a “no one” to him. That farmer would ensure better care of those farm animals, his possessions, than he ever might for me. And one misstep…well, that was never allowed. I was clearly disposable in his plans.

Typical.

What is it with them? Will they ever make space for me… for my generation? I know I have made some pretty self-absorbed bad choices, but must wonder where they think I ever learned this stuff. They seem too involved with celebrating their own lives to ever even recognize that I am right here searching for a home. Will I ever find the home I search for?

For Discussion: By position, attitude, or tradition, how might our faith communities not be making space for young people? Please comment below with your critique clarifications, and responses. <image source>

Next: Choose Grace

D. Scott Miller

D. Scott Miller is the dean of Catholic Youth Ministry bloggers which is a polite way of either saying that he is just plain old or has been blogging for a long time (since 2004.)

Scott recently married the lovely Anne and together they have five adult young people and also grandparent three delightful kids (so, maybe he is just plain old!) Scott presently serves at Saint John the Evangelist in Columbia, MD as the director of youth and young adult ministry.

He has previously served on the parish, regional, diocesan, and national levels as well as having taught within a catholic high school. He is one of the founders of RebuildMyChurch and has returned to posting regularly (keeping regular is important to old guys) at ProjectYM.